
Claude Monet, Garden at Sainte-Adresse
The man and woman standing by the sea remind me of me and David
I have been too busy with baby James, and sometimes too lazy, to respond to my husband’s loving message in a previous post marking our special 10th wedding anniversary. Thankfully it is still 2013, our 10th anniversary year, and I should no longer delay saying something about such a sweet thing he wrote in that post. So here it is:
The night I met him was one of the most enchanting nights of my life, a beautiful, magical night in August 2000. In retrospect, that night was so special because it set in motion big changes in our lives for many years to come. We certainly had no idea then. Although 13 years have passed us by and I don’t remember the last time I felt young, carefree and invincible, I still remember vividly myself and my impressions that night when I first saw him. 20-year-old David was the best-looking young man in the crowd. He was not so handsome in a popular, chiseled way, but he had the gentlest look in his eyes. His eyes radiated compassion, generosity, discipline and clarity of thoughts. I was drawn to him at first out of pure curiosity.
Back to that magical night on the beach in Thailand. I observed the 20-year-old David a little bit and saw that he was busy watching people. I had never seen anyone so focused on people watching before. Behind his glasses his eyes seemed subdued but definitely were hard at work. Aha, a soul keen on learning human nature. Interesting. I don’t believe in love at first sight so am not going to say that I fell in love with him even though he was certainly enticing. I was quite curious about David, his past, present, and future. I became even more intrigued when he chose me for a dance on a newspaper. Our first touch was memorable. My heart raced and I ended up losing sleep that night due to all the excitement of meeting so many new people.
We became close friends and started talking to each other about everything under the sky. In our conversations we covered issues in philosophy and psychology, sociology and politics, human nature and literature. Our conversations were stimulating, liberating, uplifting and enriching. I found it easy to talk to him at length about many things. In my mind’s eyes right now, I can see us sitting by the pool being bitten up by mosquitoes but not caring because we were having such a good time talking to each other.
The first year of getting to know David was an eye-opening and exciting experience for me. We had an amazing time getting to know each other. On our first date, David sang for me during our long walk on the beach. Few things could compare with being surrounded by the sea, the waves, the ocean wind while being sung to by a special someone for the first time.

Lam and Baby James on Hua Hin beach earlier this year
We enjoyed great company in our immediate circle of friends. We climbed mountains with Ryan–my first-ever mountain climbing experience. I loved the thrill of trying to navigate one’s way to the top of a mountain and looking down. We took a train trip to Mai’s hometown for Thai’s new year in April and had so much fun dancing with Thai people in a parade and participating in their water-throwing festivity. I had never known such over-the-top celebration before. We even walked alongside the elephants in the parade. We traveled with Professor Ted, our dear friend, to a Krishnamurti retreat deep in the forest and explored the wilderness together. We would walk for many hours in a completely strange village in a remote region in Thailand just to see the mountains, the fields and how the villagers lived. We would have such long, good, honest conversations every time we trekked or traveled together.
During our first year, we discovered that we had many things in common and came tovalue our friendship a great deal.
Over the course of our marriage, we have evolved from very close friends to best friends who are willing to sacrifice our egos and idiosyncrasies to live in harmony with one another. And with the years we have gained more things to talk about (i.e. our children) and learned to sacrifice more for the sake of our growing family.
We have not stopped being best friends and we have not stopped talking. After 13 years of knowing him, David is still the best-looking young man in ANY crowd. I am convinced what we have is love.